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Heaven and hell jokes
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Three college football coaches were

flying across the country when their airplane crashed and all three
died.
They all noticed God up in the clouds sitting in a chair. God
motioned
for one of them to come into the clouds.

God
wanted to know three things: "Who are you? What did you do? What
did
people think of you?"

The first coach said, "I'm Joe Paterno. I
coached Penn State from
1966 to 2000. I won 300 games, 19 bowl
victories, 2 national
championships, and won Coach of the Year 4 times.
The people of Pennsylvania think
I'm great."

God said,
"Fine, Joe, stand at my right side."

The next person said, "I'm
Bobby Bowden. I coached Florida State
University from 1980 to 2000.
I had a .816 win percentage, played in 14
bowl games without a loss
and won a national championship after beating
Nebraska. The people
of Florida think I'm great."

God said, "Fine, Bobby, stan
d at my left side."

The third coach stood before God and said,
"I'm Bob Stoops. I took
over a storied Oklahoma program that had
won 6 national championships and
held many NCAA records but had
fallen to the lowest of the low. In the
3 years prior to me taking over
the Sooners they went 3-8 (worst season
in 102 years of football),
4-8, and 5-6, beating Texas only once and
not beating Colorado or
Nebraska, not to mention losing to OSU. I coached
the Sooners for a
season and a half, going 7-5 in my first year beating
a top-15
Texas A&M with my unranked team and taking the Sooners to a
bowl game.
7 games into my second season we were undefeated and I took
the
Sooners to #1 in the AP poll, Coaches poll, and BCS poll. We beat #10

Texas 63-14, #2 Kansas State in Manhattan 41-31, and #1 Nebraska 31-14.

Our quarterback was the frontrunner for the Heisman trophy, we were
in
the driver's seat for the national championship, and th
e people of
Oklahoma think you are sitting in my chair."
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